There are some real @rseholes on this planet - caution heavy

sebastiaan56 · Post by **sebastiaan56** » Wed Apr 29, 2009 9:20 am

My neighbour is selling up and moving. He asked if he could lop some bushes that were restricting the view so he could maximise the sale price. I agreed with strict conditions on what could and could not be done.

So I get home yesterday afternoon and there was total bedlam. His promise to supervise the loppers was not kept and it was a disaster. Most upsetting was the tree that was planted when my eldest died that was his memorial. Lopped with a metre left the memorial stone trampled and the distinct smell of urine.

Needless to say I blew my top big time and the police came to speak to me about making threats. I drank a bottle of Gin.

Its like having him die again.

Dennis Leahy · Post by **Dennis Leahy** » Wed Apr 29, 2009 10:26 am

Sebastiaan,

Very sorry to hear about this.

Throw away the rest of the bottle, have someone else (wife, friend, other neighbor) go to him and get a couple of hundred dollars to help you with the financial part of planting a new tree and then you can rededicate a memorial. Soon the arsehole will be gone, but your precious memories of your eldest are yours forever. You certainly have every right to be upset, but don't allow this to shake your foundations.

Dennis

Nick · Post by **Nick** » Wed Apr 29, 2009 12:29 pm

Well said Dennis, My sentiments exactly.
Sorry to hear of your turmoil Sebastiaan. Nothing I could say can heal the hurt that has been caused to you, except to double up Dennis's comments. I would, once you've calmed down or get somebody neutral even if you are understandably unable to, go and ask the neighbour what his exact instructions were to the arborists. Between them there has been an injustice done to you, your family & your son's memory. One of them has to apologize & make amends.

Ron Wisdom · Post by **Ron Wisdom** » Wed Apr 29, 2009 12:30 pm

Geez, Sebastiaan, I can't think of a lower blow than that. My heart goes out to you, mate.

Ron

John Steele · Post by **John Steele** » Wed Apr 29, 2009 12:46 pm

Sounds like a pretty crappy way to end the day. I can't think of anything that would help other than to say given the circumstances you're allowed and people will understand. While I am new here, I see you offer support to all that need it. Back atcha M8
J

Paul B · Post by **Paul B** » Wed Apr 29, 2009 2:18 pm

My heart goes out to you, though nothing I can say will make you feel better.

You're a better man than I. If I were in your shoes, I'd be in the police lockup right now and several people would be in the ER, ICU, or worse (pehaps me too), and it would benefit nobody at all. But then I'm a little intemperate and fairly reactive when it comes to protecting family. Sometimes that's a character fault, and sometimes not - the trick is in knowing which is which. Takes a lot for me to lose my temper these days, but what you've just been through would have flicked all my switches into "grab blunt object, go nuts, tear everyone a new asshole" mode. But to what purpose?

Just try to remember that the people that we've lost, live on in our hearts and minds, not in blocks of stone or trees planted in their honour. It's your memory that keeps them alive in your heart, and that's about all we can hope for, all of us. Nobody can take that away.

Peace bro,

Paul

kiwigeo · Post by **kiwigeo** » Thu Apr 30, 2009 3:40 am

Hey Seb that just sucks big time. Look at the bright side mate...theres a good chance your new neighbours will be alot better than the old ones.

As for the arborists.....sounds like they were untrained w***ers with just enough brain cells to be able to work the throttle of a chainsaw. Even if they had poor instructions from your neighbour that doesnt give them the right to trample and piss on your property. Bldi amateurs.

As for a replacement tree.....Ive got an aging Claret Ash in my front garden that will need replacing soon. How about we dedicate it to your son and then you'll have a darned good excuse to come and visit me in Adelaide.

Cheers Martin

sebastiaan56 · Post by **sebastiaan56** » Thu Apr 30, 2009 5:37 am

Thank you everyone for your thoughts, they all mean a lot to me.

Dennis, dont worry about the bottle mate, the days of doing that more than once a week are long gone

Paul, you are right, its the wisdom of getting older. The problem is that it denies the satisfaction of revenge and until I can actually let go its lip service to peace. The memorial needs to be rebuilt first.

We will do the cleanup on the weekend. My dear friend is bring over her shredder, a 4hp two stroke jobbie. Im thinking of a 5am start.... The sooner they are out, the better.

Martin, that is a very generous offer, I'll take that off line.

Sebastiaan

kiwigeo · Post by **kiwigeo** » Thu Apr 30, 2009 6:43 am

sebastiaan56 wrote: We will do the cleanup on the weekend. My dear friend is bring over her shredder, a 4hp two stroke jobbie. Im thinking of a 5am start.... The sooner they are out, the better.

A two stroke eh..should be nice and noisy. Perfect machine to crank up right next to your neighbour's bedroom window at 6am on Sunday morning. If that doesnt wake him up then crank up the leaf blower and your router as well.

Hippety Hop · Post by **Hippety Hop** » Thu Apr 30, 2009 9:36 am

Litter your front yard and nature strip with old cars and parts from a wreckers. Potential buyers are usually fussy about the neighbours they are moving next to. That should cost him at least 10% of his expected property value.

Turf your empty pizza boxes and gin bottles out there too.

Lillian · Post by **Lillian** » Thu Apr 30, 2009 2:40 pm

Sebastian that freaking sucks big time. I would gladly go through my trip three times over to undo your day.

5 am sound more than reasonable to me.

Kim · Post by **Kim** » Thu Apr 30, 2009 5:20 pm

Real sorry to hear of this Sebastiaan, truly sad for you and the family.

Being the fellow I am, I find myself torn between the sage and most sensible advice offered by Dennis and the satisfaction of revenge offered in Hip's suggestion. Therefore, I would probably do both, first I would seek compensation from your neighbor to have the memorial rebuilt and then I would park old wrecks, pizza boxes and empty gin bottles on the front lawn and do a huge burnout leaving tyre marks up and down the road in front of the neighbour's house.

I would also keep an eye on the reality section of the paper and when your neighbour has a "home open" day, make a booking to have the septic tanks pumped to coincide. Failing that I would stand at the letter box in my underpants and open dressing gown winking and smiling at all the prospective buyers regardless of sex.

Ah but it's a dream, the reality of course is that Dennis is on the money, do what you can to put this behind mate, I hope it all turns out well for you soon and when this jerk has left, the new neighbor turns out to be the best friend you ever had.

Cheers

Kim

Craig · Post by **Craig** » Thu Apr 30, 2009 6:40 pm

G'day Sebastiaan,

Stinks big time . He's definatley a complete arsehole. Sooner he's gone the better . Put it behind you mate and rest assured ,with an attitude he has ,he'll get 'His" somewhere along the line.

I like some of the suggestions above though

All my very best wishes go your way at this time Sebastiaan . Take care mate.

Regards Craig

Allen · Post by **Allen** » Thu Apr 30, 2009 6:53 pm

I'm all for Kim bunking at your place, and walking around in his undies. If that doesn't devalue a property, then just get the whole gang from John Maddisons to have Blue Mountain Playmakers session.

Oh the debauchery.

And I'm deeply saddened by the turn of events to your neighborly offer to help a bloke out.

kiwigeo · Post by **kiwigeo** » Thu Apr 30, 2009 8:17 pm

Hey Seb,

Find out when the open inspections are happening and arrange for Allen to rock up during same on his Harley clad in his backless chaps....if Im free I'll get my sequinned posing pouch on and come along as Allen's pillion passenger.

Nick · Post by **Nick** » Thu Apr 30, 2009 8:55 pm

kiwigeo wrote:Allen to rock up during same on his Harley clad in his backless chaps....if Im free I'll get my sequinned posing pouch on and come along as Allen's pillion passenger.

Is there any 'easy' way to burn that image from my mind?

Hey Seb, hope you are feeling better dude & your solution has bought you some comfort.

Hesh1956 · Post by **Hesh1956** » Thu Apr 30, 2009 9:40 pm

Sebastiaan my friend my heart goes out to ya - big time. This really sucks.

Hang in bro.

Dennis Leahy · Post by **Dennis Leahy** » Fri May 01, 2009 1:45 pm

Hi Sebastiaan,

Today, I bought three small plum trees. The plan for one of the trees is that it will be dedicated to my wife's brother who died quite a few years ago. Her family had planted a tree in his honor in their yard, and that property was sold long ago, and so of course, my wife hasn't seen that tree in many years. And recently she told me she'd like to plant a new tree in our yard as a memorial.

So, after I bought the trees today, I was driving with my 9-year old daughter, and told her what just happened to you. She couldn't believe it, and felt really badly for you. When I told her I was thinking about asking you if it would be OK to plant the second tree in your eldest child's memory, she thought that was a great idea. Of course, this does not take the place of your own memorial and your own tree, but would be an additional memorial tree planted in their honor.

So, if you think this is a good idea, please let me know your child's name. I'll photograph the tree, post a photo here, and send you a photo as well.

Dennis

Nick · Post by **Nick** » Fri May 01, 2009 1:52 pm

:bh Well done Dennis, what a lovely gesture, I almost teared up there for a sec when I read your thought and good job with your parenting too! your daughter obviously has been taught the value of a social conscience and a sense of fair play.
What a great little community we have here! I'm in serious danger of getting a dose of warm fuzzies.

joel · Post by **joel** » Fri May 01, 2009 4:43 pm

Sebastiaan, I'd like to add my condolances to those already offered.

Kim wrote:stand at the letter box in my underpants and open dressing gown winking and smiling

Geez Kim, you make it sound a bit deviant. Perhaps that's why my neighbours won't stop for a chat and are reluctant to come around my place for a beer? Nah!

sebastiaan56 · Post by **sebastiaan56** » Fri May 01, 2009 5:23 pm

Hi everyone,

Im a bit overwhelmed by the support here, but it is all very gratefully received. Where do I start?

Kim, Martin, Allen, Hip, you're all bad bugga's after my own heart! Allen in his chaps eeewwwww, Kim in his jocks eeewwwww

Tomorrow is the showing, Im tossing up whether to put Uncle Meat flat out on my sons amp and PA speakers.... Another friend suggested I go to the chemist and get some syringes and strew them around the gutters. Hip's suggestion of a fixer upper on the lawn is positively delightful! All very evil I know but I want him out. So Im gonna stay put.

Dennis / Martin, I am overwhelmed by your offers. I will write to you offline. Your daughter sounds like a gem Dennis, you are a lucky man!

DarwinStrings · Post by **DarwinStrings** » Fri May 01, 2009 9:39 pm

Well I don't know what to say Sebastiaan. When I read you post I cried. As I read down the page though I got a good laugh to compensate for the sadness i felt over the situation.

Jim

Steve · Post by **Steve** » Sat May 02, 2009 8:52 am

Hi Sebastian,
What a crook thing to have happen. Not sure what you are thinking of doing, but all may not be lost with regards to your tree. Not sure what species it is, but if there's a metre left of the trunk, you may well get some coppice suckers coming up when the weather warms up again in spring. If you decide to give it a go, it'll help your chances of success to give the area around the tree a bit of fert, water & plenty of light. Sometimes the coppice can proliferate & then die off, so it will also increase your chances of success by striking cuttings from the coppice. If you decide to give it a try, let me know & I can put you in touch with our propagation guys at work - they specialise in eucalypts, but are pretty handy with other tree species.
Regards,
Steve

Ron Wisdom · Post by **Ron Wisdom** » Sun May 03, 2009 2:31 am

I might back off a bit. If the house doesn't sell you might be stuck with him for a neighbor for much longer.

Ron

kiwigeo · Post by **kiwigeo** » Sun May 03, 2009 8:12 am

Dennis Leahy wrote:
So, if you think this is a good idea, please let me know your child's name. I'll photograph the tree, post a photo here, and send you a photo as well.

Dennis

Youre an absolute knob mate....!!

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There are some real @rseholes on this planet - caution heavy

There are some real @rseholes on this planet - caution heavy

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