Computer Terms in Australia

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Kim
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Joined: Wed Sep 26, 2007 8:32 pm
Location: South of Perth WA

Computer Terms in Australia

Post by Kim » Thu Apr 09, 2009 8:50 pm

No wonder us Aussies took to this pewta stuff so quickly, we had already been using the lingo since a ram was a horny sheep and there's also free porn :D


LOG ON: Adding wood to make the barbie hotter.
LOG OFF: Not adding any more wood to the barbie.
MONITOR: Keeping an eye on the barbie.
DOWNLOAD: Getting the firewood off the Ute.
HARD DRIVE: Making the trip back home without any cold tinnies.
KEYBOARD: Where you hang the Ute keys.
WINDOW: What you shut when the weather's cold.
SCREEN: What you shut in the mozzie season.
BYTE: What mozzies do.
MEGABYTE: What Townsville mozzies do.
CHIP: A bar snack.
MICROCHIP: What's left in the bag after you've eaten the chips.
MODEM: What you did to the lawns.
LAPTOP: Where the cat sleeps.
SOFTWARE: Plastic knives & forks you get at Red Rooster.
HARDWARE: Stainless steel knives & forks - from K-Mart.
MOUSE: The small rodent that eats the grain in the shed.
MAINFRAME: What holds the shed up.
WEB: What spiders make.
WEBSITE: Usually in the shed or under the verandah.
SEARCH ENGINE: What you do when the Ute won't go.
CURSOR: What you say when the Ute won't go.
YAHOO: What you say when the Ute does go.
UPGRADE: A steep hill.
SERVER: The person at the pub who brings out the counter lunch.
MAIL SERVER: The bloke at the pub who brings out the counterlunch.
USER: The neighbour who keeps borrowing things.
NETWORK: What you do late summer when you drag the net for prawns.
INTERNET: Where you want the prawns to go.
NETSCAPE: What the prawns do when they discover a hole in the net.
ONLINE: Where you hang the washing.

OFFLINE: Where the washing ends up when the pegs aren't strong enough.

Cheers

Kim

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kiwigeo
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Location: Adelaide, Sth Australia

Post by kiwigeo » Fri Apr 10, 2009 3:44 pm

Ya wanna hear a better joke about IT.....Ive been here on this rig for 3 days now and 95% of my time has been spent on the phone to IT help desks in 3 different countries. No email and can only print from one application. Opening a word document takes 15 minutes......my tea intake has increase tenfold since I got on board. :?

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